Poor Thing. Can’t even afford clothes…

Morris . . . → Read More: Hot Momma]]> Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm..
A couple of days after that, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, ‘You’re really doing great, aren’t you?’

Morris replied, ‘Just doing what you said, Doc: ‘Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.”
The doctor said, ‘I didn’t say that.. I said, ‘You’ve got a heart murmur; be careful.’

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‘No,’ he replied, ‘Arthritis.’

Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a check-up, the doctor tells them that they’re physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember ..

Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. ‘Want anything while . . . → Read More: Couple In Their Nineties]]>

Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a check-up, the doctor tells them that they’re physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember ..

Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. ‘Want anything while I’m in the kitchen?’ he asks.
‘Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?’
‘Sure..’
‘Don’t you think you should write it down so you can remember it?’ she asks.
‘No, I can remember it.’
‘Well, I’d like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so as not to forget it?’
He says, ‘I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.’
‘I’d also like whipped cream. I’m certain you’ll forget that, write it down?’ she asks.
Irritated, he says, ‘I don’t need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream – I got it, for goodness sake!’

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Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, The old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.. She stares at the plate for a moment.
‘Where’s my toast ?’

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‘ SEX FROGS ‘

Only $20 each! Comes with ‘ complete ‘  instructions.

The blonde excitedly looks around to see . . . → Read More: Sex Frogs]]> A blonde  goes to her local pet store in search of an ‘ exotic ‘  pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a  box FULL of frogs.
The sign says:

‘ SEX FROGS ‘

Only $20 each!
Comes with ‘ complete ‘  instructions.

The blonde excitedly looks around to see if anybody ‘ s watching her.
She whispers  softly to the man behind the counter,   ‘ I ‘ ll TAKE  one! ‘
As the man packages the frog, he quietly  says to her, ‘ Just follow the instructions! ‘
The blonde nods, grabs the  box, and  is quickly on her way home.

As soon as she closes the door to her  apartment, she opens the instructions and reads them  very carefully.  She does EXACTLY what is  specified:
1. Take  a shower.
2. Splash on some nice  perfume.
3. Slip into a very sexy  nightie.
4. Crawl into bed and place the  frog down beside you, and allow the frog to do  what he has been trained to do.

She then quickly  gets into bed with the frog and to her surprise, NOTHING happens! The blonde is very disappointed and quite upset at this point. She re-reads the instructions and notices at the bottom of the paper it says, ‘ If you have any problems or questions, please call the pet  store. ‘
So, she calls the pet store.  The man says, ‘ I ‘ ll be right over. ‘

Within minutes the  man is ringing her doorbell. The blonde welcomes him in and says, ‘ See, I ‘ ve done everything  according to the instructions. The damn frog just SITS there! ‘

The man, looking very concerned, picks up the frog, stares directly into its eyes and STERNLY says,

‘LISTEN TO ME!
I ‘ m only  going to show you how to do this

ONE ….  MORE ..  TIME!!! ‘

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Do you know who makes the rules?

As sportsmen, it is absolutely imperative that in all of the sports we engage, we, without hesitation, play by the . . . → Read More: The Rule Maker]]>

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Do you know who makes the rules?

As sportsmen, it is absolutely imperative that in all of the sports we engage, we, without hesitation, play by the rules…

We take care to understand the rules, we discuss the rules amongst ourselves, and we study the rules…

As golfers, we are ruled by the rules.. Lord knows there are all kinds of rules in that game.

And as citizens, we must follow the rule of law for so many things we do every day..

But just in case you have been pondering this, all your life, as to whom actually makes the rules, please note the following:

… I do hope this clears it up….

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